When the audience is nil

In a Newsweek interview, Imre Kertesz mentioned that writing when you didn't believe the work would be published was a liberating experience, as opposed to writing for the masses or commercial success. The interview was shortly after he received the Nobel Prize and the question was sort of aimed at "Fatelessness." I enjoyed the book, and found it fascinating how horror and kindness coexisted in the camps. The reason I thought about it was my honest belief that this blog isn't really read, because there isn't really anything here. Somehow, through the wonder of modern technology, something can be posted for people to read, but because there is so much posted, there is no one left with the free minutes to devote to it. Whether I can work something out of this, I don't know, as I do believe too much navel gazing makes for a boring blog (or anything else for that matter). I guess I could label the posts, link to numerous other blogs, and generally work at ways to build readership, but, seriously, what do I have to offer people for such a few minutes of their life? The occasional post railing against the idiots in Washington, perhaps a silly picture, or not silly, an observation of what I have been reading? I wonder how all these make a life worth reading. A life worth living is an infinitely subtler beast than one worth reading, but it is the latter which is created here, and that sort of focus is what has generally been missing. Life has days when you are busy, days when you don't feel like writing, days when you really have various mundane activities to attend to (like laundry & rent & etc.), and it is these days which vanish from the blog, but it is these missing days that interest people. I tried the one a day posting method, but couldn't really think of anything for too many consecutive days that I wanted to write about, and for some reason, I have made the assumption that if I don't want to write about it, then no one will want to read about it, but with no readers, is that really an issue. Could I really spend a bit of time telling people how I wipe my arse after a good dump? And if I did, would they actually read it, and more importantly comment on it? The feedback is what is fun, even if I don't add anything as a response to the feedback. Discouragement sets in after so many postings without comments--obviously I am not connecting. Life is that way, and if anyone is actually reading this magnificent run on paragraph, which I see no end to, as I am rambling so contentedly, will they actually make a comment. (Anyone that is except Dave, who I know glances at the blog when there is a new picture.) Busy clippers, hairdresser on fire...something delightfully perverse in the lyrics. Feedback & Commentary....wow, a pair of capitalized words, this might be serious, but only if I change the name of the blog to that. With all that is going on, a blog that is a call to arms or a blog that reminds people of what sort of erosion is daily occurring to the rights that Jefferson & Hamilton disagreed about. The Hamiltonians are winning, which is kind of odd, since the Jeffersonians were for so long, but more government control because the masses demand care is what seems to be happening. Just yesterday I commented to my father about how much easier going to Europe was than coming home. Let's face it, while I had to obtain a visa for China, there was still less paperwork to get into the country than there is here, and Europe, it is a dream....probably because they assume certain things on flights from the United States.